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Thoughts About Grief

Some Thoughts About Grief:

Grieving:

Kübler-Ross said that the grieving process involves experiencing all five stages of grief, although not always in this order. Although not everyone progresses through these stages in t
he same order and not everyone experiences each stage, the feelings and emotions identified seem to be universal.

Shock and Denial: The first reaction to loss is often the inability to feel anything. This may include feeling numb, weak, overwhelmed, anxious, not yourself, or withdrawn.

Anger: Blaming yourself or others for the loss.

Bargaining: ?If you?ll just let him live, I?ll promise to go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life.?

Depression: Feeling deep sadness, disturbed sleep and eating patterns, thoughts of suicide, excessive crying.

Acceptance: Beginning to look for the lessons of the experience.

These are well documented stages to the grieving process, yet no two people?s journey will be the same. Each of us goes about the task of grieving in our own distinct way. While no one can tell you how to grieve, and no one will do your grieving for you, if you know your loved one would be
okay with your special path of grieving, then feel good about it and do it.


Feelings:

Isolated people do not let their feelings show and suppressed feelings lead to depression and other kinds of physical and mental ailments as well. Emotions are feelings in motion. We can assist those who are not open with their emotions by helping them to bring feelings to the surface. In doing so we will help ease their pain and bring them 'back' to their normal state more quickly.

The simple experience of being "accompanied" with your feelings can be comforting. Talking about feelings with the bereaved will help them to relieve anxiety.

The bereaved may need to proceed cautiously, taking baby-step risks at first, trusting their most private thoughts, feelings and needs to only one or two close and dependable friends.


Anger

Often the bereaved will experience anger about their loss. If the person has seen other crises in their lives, anger increases. Blame and anger can be directed towards God, the person lost and others. Often they may not allowed themselves to recognize, for instance, anger directed inward, or directed outward toward their departed or even the world-at-large until they are feeling stronger and in control of their life once again.


These are just some brief comments about the grieving process. I recommend going to websites about bereavement and sharing your thoughts and/or reading other's in forums. It helps to understand what is going on in other's lives.



Linda Torrey - runs a non profit grief and bereavement website - Linda Angel Bereavement & Grief Support Center - http://www.linda-angel.com This web site's sole aim is to provide free information to those in need. The website provides articles, resources, advise, forums & a free book. Download a free copy of our book Linda Angel - A story of grief recovery and spiritual healing.

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